What Story Are You Empowering?

What Story Are You Empowering?

Oct. 2010

Last week I had a review with a client. Mary wanted to go over her accounts because she and her husband are trying to buy a home. She wanted to make certain of her account balances  and make sure she would be withdrawing the money in the most advantageous way possible.

Now we have been working together for a few years and from the first moment we met that has been one of her primary goals. Mary and her husband would prefer the space and pride of owning vs. renting. One thing I couldn’t figure out was why she hadn’t purchased a house yet since there was adequate savings and income to do so.

So I asked her “What is stopping you from buying a house?”  At first Mary thought about the question and said she didn’t have an answer. She said she has always wanted to own a home in Media.

To tell the truth there has only been one place Mary has wanted to own a home and that is Media. It has also been and continues to be a little out of her price range.  I asked her has she ever looked at homes in any other town. I said that I have seen some beautiful homes in Havertown, Ridley, Springfield, etc.

 She said she has seen some nice homes in towns other than Media and they in fact were within her budget. I asked her why she hadn’t considered buying one of those homes. Again, she said she didn’t really have an answer. It’s just that she always wanted to live in Media.

I asked her how it came to be that she had convinced herself that the only place possible for her to be happy was Media? Why was it that if she somehow lived someplace else she would view that as a failure?

 From there, Mary started to realize something for herself and there was real power in this catharsis. What became the truth she had been living her life by, “I couldn’t be happy anywhere else but Media,” was a story. No one had enacted a law that the only place to live and be happy was Media.

It was a made up story she gave power to and the story had taken away the possibility of her being happy living in any other town. Having realized it was just a story, Mary has disempowered the “Media” story and has new and exciting exciting possibilities at hand.

When it comes to investing there are countless stories that people have empowered as the truth and they are running peoples’ lives. Just like Mary they are not running them for the better. They keep people stuck and don’t allow them to experience abundance or live out their life’s dreams. 

Do any of these stories ring true to you?

-“Investing is too complicated.”

-“I’m not good with money.”

-“Investing is the same thing as gambling.”

-“Wealthy people couldn’t have earned it honestly.”

-“My boss is a jerk!”

-“My Mother doesn’t understand me.”

I know the last two aren’t money stories, they can be just as demoralizing.

If none of these ring true for you, stop and take a few minutes think about the truths you hold dear. Ask yourself how did you come to have this belief? Is it really true or have you just accepted it as the truth? By accepting your story as the truth are you being empowered or disempowered?

If you find that the story is disempowering you simple drop it. Accept as nothing but a story. Take sole responsibility for empowering the story so you can have complete control over dismantling it.

Then make up a more powerful story. A good way to know if your new story is empowering you is to ask yourself how excited you are about the new possibilities you have available. If you aren’t very excited, consider you haven’t let go of the old one.

Brendan Magee is the founder and president of Inevitable Wealth Coaching. If you have questions, comments, or suggestions, call 610-446-4322 or e-mail Brendan@coachgee.com.